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Stamford Family Law Blog

Divorce on the rise for those over the age of 50

Even couples who have been married for decades may not be immune to the possibility of having marital troubles to the breaking point. When the kids have left the nest and it's just two people in their big Connecticut house for the first time in forever, they both might soon realize that the kids actually kept them together. These individuals may still be young enough to start life anew and may make the difficult decision to divorce.

According to a study, the good news is that the rate of divorce for those over the age of 50 is still not that high, even though it has doubled since 1990; yet, it is still half the rate for than for those less than 50. A university study has shown that baby boomer divorce rates aren't associated with having an empty nest, or because of illness. The study did show that the quality of the marriage, measured by how couples spent their free time together and their level of enjoyment of that time, played a significant role. Fostering a friendship over the years was also a key ingredient to having lasting marriages.

Financial concerns and divorce

The writing is on the wall. No matter how hard the Connecticut couple has tried, the marriage simply will not work out. When this happens, it is time to review one's situation and take the necessary steps toward divorce.

For most couples, financial concerns will be a prevalent factor. If the couple still uses a joint checking or savings account, now is the time to open individual accounts. Once this has been done, one's paycheck can then be deposited into this new account, and the individual can be assured that he or she will be the one with access to these funds. Additionally, one will most likely want to close joint accounts prior to or once the divorce is finalized.

Child custody is guided by presumption in favor of joint custody

The trend in child custody law, including in Connecticut, is toward favoring joint custody. In this state's child custody law, joint custody is divided into two sections, joint legal custody and joint physical custody. Legal custody refers to the decision-making that the parents make regarding the education, health and welfare of the children, whereas physical custody refers to the amount of time each parent has with physical possession of the children.

Connecticut law contains a legal presumption that joint custody is the preferable relationship. Joint child custody in this state means both legal custody and physical custody. The presumption is based on a long list of studies that have concluded that children had healthier and more positive outcomes when both parents remained strongly involved in their upbringing.

When your ex opens your mail

You may not get as much mail as you used to, but there are still envelopes that arrive in the mailbox that are for your eyes only. But what about when you move out of the house after you and your ex split up?

This might be about information that you don't want your ex to have, or it might just the principle of the matter. Either way, you don't want your ex to be snooping through your mail. What can you do to prevent your ex from getting your mail? Is it automatically a crime if it happens?

How to create a parenting schedule that works for both of you

When you and your former spouse share children, deciding how to share custody is one of the more complicated issues of a divorce. However, even if your divorce was contentious, this does not have to be painful process. You can work with your ex to create a parenting plan that protects your children and fits both of your lifestyles.

Technology may aid in abuse suffered by domestic violence victims

Being in an emotionally or physically abusive relationship can have lasting effects on both parties involved. Add in the fact that technology gives the abuser access to one's location, the ability to read text messages and listen to phone calls, making the abuse even more disturbing. The legality of the use of spyware in domestic violence cases is new and the system is having a hard time figuring the legality of such actions. Domestic violence victims and their advocates in Connecticut are learning just how invasive such spyware can be.

One woman in another state who was in an abusive relationship sought the help of private counseling. She was under the assumption that the meetings, location and what was discussed were private and that her abusive significant other was unaware; that is, until he showed up and barged into the facility by kicking the door in. He had to be removed by police.

Child support and paternity fraud are on the rise

Connecticut couples expecting a child have many exciting things to look forward to. Picking out nursery colors, acquiring all the necessary tiny items and choosing a name are just a few of the many tasks anticipated. The parents of the expected child may not be married, but that usually doesn't lessen the excitement unless the mother has not been entirely honest or faithful. The paternity of the child could come into question, which may alter child custody and child support obligations.

Should a mother be have had more than one romantic partner around the time of conception, the question of paternity could come to be questioned. The relationship between the parents may be at jeopardy, but the relationship between the suspected father and child could be severed. When paternity is in question, obtaining a paternity test is imperative, especially considering that one in 10 children are not biologically related to the man that they call their father.

Divorce shouldn't be unplanned for young Connecticut couples

As things begin to grow serious for dating Connecticut couples, marriage may become the next step. Thinking about planning a wedding can be exciting, but the foundation of a good marriage is laid when couples learn to communicate openly and honestly. The state of one's finances, including debts, should be discussed with his or her intended spouse, and both should have a clear idea of how the other manages money. Discussing the possibility of a divorce and implementing a prenuptial agreement may be a saving grace later down the road.

A wealth educator in another state has begun a program that offers couples a format for discussing their current financial situation and future financial goals along with the emotions that may be tied with money. The course ranges from six months to one year and offers worksheets, homework and lots of discussions on the topics of money, finances and future planning. The work that is completed by the participants often leads to a solid marriage and a clear financial picture.  

Spousal abuse leaves victims financially vulnerable

When one hears the words domestic abuse, many think of violent physical attacks. Although this stands to be true in many instances in Connecticut, financial abuse is often just as emotionally devastating. This aspect of spousal abuse can create the same feelings of isolation and vulnerability, especially as these instances occur behind closed doors and are often not discussed with family and close friends.

A woman in another state recalls how the abuse in her relationship escalated from emotional and financial to verbal, then physical and financial. The victim claims that her husband threatened her with filing kidnapping charges should she ever try to leave with the children. She also claims that he made it impossible for her to save any money to leave him.

Understanding the financial implications of a divorce

The breakup of a marriage is often an unfortunate and difficult situation. Many Connecticut residents find that a marital split may be the only way to save their sanity, while others find the desire to divorce one-sided and sometimes are left feeling emotionally and financially used. One man in another state is feeling exactly that when his wife of only two years asked for a divorce after her debts had been paid by the hard work and financial bestowment of her soon-to-be ex-husband.

Connecticut is known as an equitable distribution state when it comes to marital assets and debts. The goal is to divide them in a fair and equitable manner. A Superior Court judge will oversee the divorce and will supervise the division of assets and debts. While the intent is for the property division process to be fair, it does not necessarily mean that everything will be divided equally.